And now for Round 2 of our Slicing Up Eyeballs readers’ ranking: After tackling the much larger, and decades-spanning, catalog of The Cure, we’ve turned to The Smiths in an effort to sort the 70 original songs released during that band’s comparatively brief lifespan.
A quick refresher: We asked readers to vote for up to 25 of their favorite songs written by Morrissey/Marr, choosing from a ballot that listed 70 singles, B-sides and album tracks. Not included: live recordings and covers, of which there were two (“Golden Lights” and “Work is a Four-Letter Word”).
RELATED: Spotify playlist of The Smiths’ 70 original songs ranked by Slicing Up Eyeballs readers
With a total 70,192 votes cast, the full results are presented below, a list that ranks The Smiths’ complete original output from 1983 to 1987. As you’ll see, the No. 1 song, with a 234-vote margin, was a more definitive winner than in our Cure poll, where Nos. 1 and 2 were separated by a single vote. And, for the first time in any poll we’ve conducted, there were no ties anywhere on the list.
As always, thank you all so much for participating.
And now, the results:
THE ABSOLUTE BEST OF THE SMITHS: ALL 70 SONGS, RANKED
1. “There Is A Light That Never Goes Out”
Single; appears on The Queen is Dead (1986) | 2,687 votes
2. “How Soon Is Now?”
B-side of “William, It Was Really Nothing” (1984) | 2,453 votes
3. “This Charming Man”
Single; appears on The Smiths (1983/1984) | 2,321 votes
4. “Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want”
B-side of “William, It Was Really Nothing” (1984) | 2,240 votes
5. “Bigmouth Strikes Again”
Single; appears on The Queen is Dead (1986) | 2,229 votes
6. “Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now”
Non-album single (1984) | 1,988 votes
7. “The Boy With The Thorn In His Side”
Single; appears on The Queen is Dead (1985/1986) | 1,913 votes
8. “Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before”
Single; appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 1,853 votes
9. “Panic”
Non-album single (1986) | 1,783 votes
10. “What Difference Does It Make?”
Single; appears on The Smiths (1984) | 1,713 votes
11. “William, It Was Really Nothing”
Non-album single (1984) | 1,708 votes
12. “Ask”
Non-album single (1986) | 1,674 votes
13. “The Queen Is Dead”
Appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 1,666 votes
14. “Cemetry Gates”
Appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 1,657 votes
15. “Hand In Glove”
Non-album single (1983) | 1,612 votes
16. “Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me”
Single; appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 1,607 votes
17. “Girlfriend In A Coma”
Single; appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 1,597 votes
18. “Shoplifters Of The World Unite”
Non-album single (1987) | 1,578 votes
19. “I Know It’s Over”
Appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 1,558 votes
20. “The Headmaster Ritual”
Single; appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 1,434 votes
21. “Still Ill”
Single; appears on The Smiths (1984) | 1,311 votes
22. “That Joke Isn’t Funny Anymore”
Single; appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 1,264 votes
23. “Sheila Take A Bow”
Non-album single (1987) | 1,238 votes
24. “Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others”
Single; appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 1,220 votes
25. “Reel Around The Fountain”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 1,188 votes
26. “Asleep”
B-side of “The Boy With The Thorn In His Side” (1985) | 1,085 votes
27. “Frankly, Mr. Shankly”
Appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 1,069 votes
28. “You Just Haven’t Earned It Yet Baby”
Appears on The World Won’t Listen (1987) | 1,051 votes
29. “A Rush And A Push And The Land Is Ours”
Appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 1,006 votes
30. “Is It Really So Strange?”
B-side of “Sheila Take A Bow” (1987) | 992 votes
31. “Half A Person”
B-side of “Shoplifters Of The World Unite” (1987) | 954 votes
32. “Handsome Devil”
Appears on Hatful of Hollow (1984) | 916 votes
33. “I Want The One I Can’t Have”
Appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 890 votes
34. “Girl Afraid”
B-side of “Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now” (1984) | 852 votes
35. “I Started Something I Couldn’t Finish”
Single; appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 846 votes
36. “Well I Wonder”
Appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 784 votes
37. “Sweet And Tender Hooligan”
B-side of “Sheila Take A Bow” (1987) | 754 votes
38. “Death Of A Disco Dancer”
Appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 751 votes
39. “Barbarism Begins At Home”
Single; appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 737 votes
40. “What She Said”
Appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 689 votes
41. “Unloveable”
B-side of “Bigmouth Strikes Again” (1986) | 686 votes
42. “Rubber Ring”
B-side of “The Boy With The Thorn In His Side” (1985) | 671 votes
43. “Back To The Old House”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 670 votes
44. “London”
B-side of “Shoplifters Of The World Unite” (1987) | 654 votes
45. “Unhappy Birthday”
Appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 642 votes
46. “Rusholme Ruffians”
Appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 634 votes
47. “Oscillate Wildly”
B-side of “How Soon Is Now?” (1985) | 618 votes
48. “Stretch Out And Wait”
B-side of “Shakespeare’s Sister” (1985) | 598 votes
49. “This Night Has Opened My Eyes”
Appears on Hatful of Hollow (1984) | 591 votes
50. “I Won’t Share You”
Appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 580 votes
51. “Nowhere Fast”
Appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 578 votes
52. “Pretty Girls Make Graves”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 574 votes
53. “Paint A Vulgar Picture”
Appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987)) | 548 votes
54. “Meat Is Murder”
Appears on Meat Is Murder (1985) | 524 votes
55. “Vicar In A Tutu”
Appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 494 votes
56. “Never Had No One Ever”
Appears on The Queen Is Dead (1986) | 481 votes
57. “These Things Take Time”
B-side of “What Difference Does It Make? (1984) | 468 votes
58. “You’ve Got Everything Now”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 438 votes
59. “Suffer Little Children”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 396 votes
60. “Shakespeare’s Sister”
Non-album single (1985) | 384 votes
61. “Hand That Rocks The Cradle”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 362 votes
62. “Jeane”
B-side of “This Charming Man” (1983) | 355 votes
63. “Miserable Lie”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 332 votes
64. “I Don’t Owe You Anything”
Appears on The Smiths (1984) | 281 votes
65. “Accept Yourself”
B-side of “This Charming Man” (1983) | 270 votes
66. “Wonderful Woman”
B-side of “This Charming Man” (1983) | 142 votes
67. “The Draize Train”
B-side of “Panic” (1986) | 127 votes
68. “Money Changes Everything”
B-side of “Bigmouth Strikes Again” (1986) | 78 votes
69. “Death At One’s Elbow”
Appears on Strangeways, Here We Come (1987) | 74 votes
70. “I Keep Mine Hidden”
B-side of “Girlfriend In A Coma” (1987) | 64 votes
PREVIOUSLY ON SLICING UP EYEBALLS
- The Smiths’ ‘The Queen is Dead’ getting new 7- and 12-inch vinyl releases next week?
- Slicing Up Eyeballs’ Best of The Smiths: Vote for your favorite songs by Morrissey & Marr
- Listen: The Smiths’ Record Store Day 7-inch with 2 previously unreleased demos
- ‘Trump will kill America’ etched into vinyl of The Smiths’ Record Store Day single
- Watch: Morrissey walks off during ‘Everyday is Like Sunday,’ ends concert after 6 songs
- ‘Breakfast with The Smiths’ radio show finds new home on The Independent FM
- The Smiths to issue unreleased versions of 2 songs on Record Store Day 7-inch
I forget, did this list have “work is a four letter word”, it was on a compilation for Sire record, like just say yes????, something like that
the song was not good, it would be like number 71.
I love these lists, keep it up, and thank-you
Marc
Work is a four letter word wasn’t on this list. Personally, though I know many people hate it, it is a big personal favorite, I love what they did with the song, it’s a fantastic cover in my opinion. As for the list, it’s unbelievable, in a bad way, that “Well I wonder” is below “Is it really so strange?” but lists are just that lists. Nice poll again, though, it was fun.
Shocked “Handsome Devil” placed so low, but when it comes to Smiths songs, it’s hard to go “Marry, Shag or Throw Off a Cliff?”
I’m surprised that #16 is as high as it is… and I’m surprised that #41 is as low as it is!
I know, there is no dispute in matters of taste, but FFS, half the first album in the bottom 15?
Glad to see Golden Lights didn’t even make the list. The only bad song they ever recorded IMO. Nice to see other fans agree.
C’mon people, read the post…”Work is a Four-Letter Word” and “Golden Lights” weren’t even eligible for the voting as they are not Morrissey\Marr originals.
Been waiting for the results for days! Thanks for doing this poll.
Any plans for another one?
Yeah (R.E.M.). I (R.E.M.) agree with (R.E.M.) what (R.E.M.) Nortley asked.
(Read the above in your best Kevin Nealon impression)
Yes. R.E.M.
A New Order poll would be interesting. Even post-JD, their output is so stylistically different depending on what album/year you’re listening to. Plus, it might finally put to rest the “No Hooky, no New Order” argument.
Probably not, but Music Complete was far and away their best album since Brotherhood. A New Order poll would be great though!
I agree, New Order Poll please…..
Yes please!
These polls are fun, I want you to know, slicing up eyeballs I want you to know so glad to have you all back on the scene. Cheers to all involved!
Don’t ever need to hear ‘How Soon Is Now’ ever again. One of the most overplayed songs ever.
Tend to agree, but when you first ever hear it. it is awesome.
Exactly right. I remember going off to university in fall 1984 and discovering “college radio,” and keeping a running list of songs and bands that caught my ear. “How Soon Is Now” was toward the top of the list — the first time you heard it was kind of a consciousness-changing experience, like a door had been opened. The Smiths probably have better and more representative songs, but none more distinctive.
Personally speaking I can never hear “How Soon Is Now” enough. Still compelling all these years late.
But any short list of most overplayed songs for me would have to include:
Been Caught Stealing – Jane’s Addiction
Blister in the Sun – Violent Femmes
Under The Bridge – Red Hot Chili Peppers
She Blinded Me With Science – Thomas Dolby
Jeremy – Pearl Jam
I still remember walking into a college bar (late night on Christmas Eve) and “How Soon is Now” was playing and we started dancing immediately. It was pure joy and I still love it. For the next awesome poll, I suggest New Order or Depeche Mode.
Slightly disappointed in the list? Still great, but was hoping to see album tracks like “Fountain”, “I Know it’s Over” and “What She Said” a little higher. The top 20 is almost just a singles comp.
Exactly how I felt about the Cure list.
I think that will be the case with all of these polls.
A New Order poll will have “Bizarre Love Triangle,” “Love Vigilantes,” “Blue Monday,” “True Faith” etc. near the top and a R.E.M. poll would likely have “Losing My Religion,” “The One I Love,” “It’s The End of the World,” “Fall on Me, “Radio Free Europe” etc. near the top.
Good songs all, but also the best known.
Stunned at how low some of the Meat is Murder tracks are.
Horrible list IMO.
My top 15
1.Well I Wonder
2.Boy with the thorn..
3.Headmaster Ritual
4.This Charming Man
5.This Night has opened my Eyes
6.I Dont Owe you Anything
7.Accept Yourself
8.Half a Person
9.Heaven Knows…
10.Some Girls are bigger..
11.Unloveable
12. Stop me if you’ve…
13.Cemetery Gates
14. I Know its over
15. Girlfriend in Coma
That Joke isnt funny anymore should be there in there…oops. The minute I saw I dont owe you and Accept yourself in the bottom ten I stopped reading.
Surprised at how low I Won’t Share You is.
How about a Spotify playlist?
Here you go:
http://www.slicingupeyeballs.com/2017/06/27/the-smiths-spotify-playlist/
Nice work, thanks!
Not surprised at the top 10. There is a light was on my list as well. A perfect song that I will NEVER deny. That Joke is my other favorite.
Meat Is Murder ahead of Suffer Little Children? So much to answer for…
Am I the only one who loves Jeane?
No.
Woah woah woah “hand that rocks the cradle” needs to be way farther up on the list like top 20
AMEN!
Reel Around the Fountain 25……cmon…….
Very good Top 25. Barbarism begins at home should have been in there though instead of Reel around the fountain.
That joke, Jeane, What difference, Well I wonder, I don’t owe you, Stretch ou and wait, Suffer little children, Shakespeare’s sister, Paint a vulgar, Barbarism, Back to the old house, Asleep, the hand that rocks, Reel around…
Magical…..every single one of those songs.
I would have had Meat Is Murder #1 and Wonderful Woman #2.
Can’t believe Wonderful Woman and Shakespeare’s Sister are that low. I’m bored of This Charming Man. The Boy With the Thorn In His Side is rubbish.